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#072 – Parasite Eve II Review

This week, the clan dives into Parasite Eve II. Here’s the writeup:

Parasite Eve 2 is an action role-playing survival game released for the PlayStation. The game was developed by Square Enix, and published in 1999 in Japan and the US, and in 2000 everywhere else. The game has sold just over a million copies as of February 2004, and was released on the PlayStation Network August 23, 2011. The music was composed by Naoshi Mizuta, and arranged by Hiroshi Nakajima. The soundtrack took a year and a half to compose, and Mizuta was given a lot of freedom.

Story:

This game opens up peaceful enough. We meet up with Aya Brea, og protagonist from the first game, who is now an FBI member working for an elite squad known as MIST (Mitochondrial Investigation and Suppression Team) Lol. She’s currently dispatched on a mission in LA, where there have been reports of NMC sightings (Neo Mitochondrial Creatures). We start this bad boy out investigating the Akropolis tower, which is now home to NMC’s, and a bunch of dead swat members. We eventually run into No. 9, who is some sort of humanoid Neo-mitochondrial creature. This beastman ends up destroying the tower, but not before Aya and her friend Rupert are rescued in a police helicopter. We then head to Dryfield, another location infested by freakish beasts, including a fucking Elder Camel that totally reminds me of the grand master from the Kill Bill series. We meet up with a survivor named Mr. Douglas, naturally, and his loyal beast Flint. Douglas is sort of our informer for the next little bit. We also rescue Kyle Madigan, a PI claiming to be on a similar mission. He tells tale of a “Shelter” nearby that may contain the answers we’re looking for. But not before we fight craiggers himself! Oh, and of course, we get a sweet shower scene.

Aya and Kyle set out to find the shelter through an abandoned mine. This is where the Elder Camel finally shows his face. After we defeat this epicly bearded beast, we find a secret entrance to The Shelter. Here we find out that the AANMC’s are a result of genetic engineering to create superior life forms. We also find that these beasts were created using her DNA. Oh, also the “Star Wars” esque waste beast battle? Jesus Christ the FUCKING CAMERA ANGLE!!!!!!asdfasdfasd

We then find the fourth area, called Neo-Ark. This area was created as sort of a Jurassic Park-esque showcase for the ANMC’s. We meet up with Kyle, and rescue a little girl that was controlling the NMC’s. This turns out to be Eve? How? I don’t fucking know. But we soon find out that Eve was created using her DNA, thus sort of making her Aya’s daughter. But I mean, that also means that we’ve spent this whole game killing all of her other children, so whatever. Fine. I’ll accept this shit. Aya is later attacked by a huge group of golum beasts, but is rescued by the US Marines. Ameeericaaaaaa!!!!!! We later get a couple gifts from Mr. Douglas, and track down Eve to a giant room containing a cocoon. They’re trying to stuff Eve into it, and Kyle turns on No. 9 and kills him. We then get a cutscene where Bill Clinton wipes Dryfield off the map, and displaces the fuck out of our party. And now we fight the vag n balls beast.

The last NMC in the game is pretty brutal, since he harnesses the power of the sun in his shaft. Once we successfully geld this motherfucker, we move to the final fight. Eve. Again. She transforms into a beast that sort of resembles the second to last form of Eve in the first game. Once we beat this super OP boss, we get a few cutscenes. The good, and canon, ending features Aya adopting Eve as her sister with help from Mist. We then see a cutscene where Pierce gives them two tickets to the American Natural History Museum in NY, where we run into Kyle Madigan again.

 

Gameplay:

This game plays like a standard survival horror game. Tank controls. Also, cuntish camera angles. There isn’t an active time bar that governs actions, and the battles take place in real time. They removed the stupid Range Dome feature that the first game came with, which gives users to engage from further away. All enemies are in plain view, unless they’re the BDSM ninjas, which allows the player to avoid fights when they want. We get a chance to customize our weapons similarly to the first game, but it’s fairly limited. Armor lets us add extra items slots, which dictate what items can be used during combat. We also have a few different elements to our PE abilities: fire, wind, water, and earth. The game features a NG+ that offers you bonus items; not that you’ll ever want to experience this fucker again.

 

Enjoy the NUDE!

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